For a female or male, size small or whale;
Dirty or clean, it must be in my genes,
Just give me a pair, that's all I care...
Hi, my name is Lily.
and I'm addicted to stealing underpants.
I usually wait patiently for someone to leave their dresser drawers opened so I can steal a few pairs and make a run for it. But, just recently I've discovered that I can just steal underpants from the dirty clothes... which is MUCH easier. And, no one stands guard to the dirty clothes for some reason.
After I steal the undies, whether clean or dirty, I make haste to nearest dark closet. I go inside and just sit with my conquered treasures. I don't know why, I just do. I just like to hold them, and wear them, and be with them...Sometimes I wear them on my head like a hat, but I do like to switch it up and wear them over my pants. Jack gets jealous and tries to take them sometimes. I don't know why he doesn't just wear a pair over his pants.
With my stealth-like speed and reflexes, it usually takes several minutes before I ever get caught. When mom starts calling my name and wondering where I am, I don't make a peep. But eventually, she'll find me in my dark corner with my treasures.
Which is when she takes them. Which is, naturally, when I start plotting the next underpant heist.
Maybe....I should just ask for some for my birthday...
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